We're Just a Little Broken
by tsukasayuki
Summary: One shot, kind of long, but I finally found myself aboard the AlvinxLeia train, and while I still like AlvinxMilla better, there's just a lot of AlvinxLeia drama to have. Pretty much 6 months after the events of Tales of Xillia, Leia can't stop thinking about Alvin and all the horrible things he did, or why she thinks she has feelings for him. Language and Suggestive Themes.


It's not like someone can forget something tragic. It's not like trying to pretend something horrible that happened never did happen. They say time heals all wounds, but in truth time only creates the false illusion that everything is better, but there will always be a small piece that will make a person remember something they tried to forget.

Leia Rolando always lived by the mantra forgive and forget. She was raised by her father to love everyone and treat them with respect. Of course, she was raised by her mother to not be a pushover and if someone deserved a good beating, then make sure to give it to them. Leia always took her parents' advice to heart, and even though she wasn't the best child around (especially with the whole running away to go with Jude and Milla and that whole escapade half a year ago without telling her parents), they were happy to know she was alive and well.

Ever since they stopped King Gaius's power hungry craze about six months ago, the old team split up to go their separate ways. Leia still received letters from Jude, Elize, and Rowen, and even the latter two occasionally visited her (after all, her family does own the best inn in Leronde). She's been visited a couple of times from Jude, but with his new work studying the effective use of spyrites and the like, he's been a bit busy, which is totally understandable. Milla had gone back to the spirit realm to watch over both Rieze Maxia and Elympios with the four, but she also had the four deliver letters to everyone. Leia missed Milla, but she understood why she couldn't come visit.

There was one person, however, that she hadn't even heard from since they departed. Leia didn't understand why, but often times she would find herself thinking about a certain man that really had no redeeming qualities yet he was on her mind constantly. Perhaps it was because he was the only one who hadn't contacted her? She knew what he was up to: he started a business with Yurgen up in Elympios, but the fact that he had wrote to everyone else except her kind of aggravated her. He didn't have the privilege to pick and choose – they were all part of a crew that had been through a lot together, and a lot of the things they went through was _because _of him. So the fact that after half a year, he didn't even bother to say a word to her, irritated the hell out of her.

After a long day of serving at her parents' inn, Leia had taken the evening off to actually relax a bit, advice taken from her worried father. She had been working way too hard and it concerned both of her parents. Working hard helped keep her thoughts away, and she never liked to dwell on silly things, but she did take the advice. Leia calmly readied a bath for herself and stepped in slowly, ready to soothe her muscles. As she soothed in the bath and let her thoughts turn to nothing, a small sting on the back of her left shoulder knocked her thoughts back to reality. Her eyes opened with a solemn stare and she reached across her chest with her right arm, attempting to touch the cause of the stinging pain.

Even though it had been about six or so months since the incident, there was still a small scar to prove that it did indeed happen. She tried to forget, but sometimes that small spot would sting with pain. It always brought up a painful memory; a memory that was part of who she was, but one she'd rather forget. Vague glimpses of that painful event flashed in her mind. Milla was assumed to have died and it sent everyone in an emotional spiral. Rowen and Elize seemed to have gotten over it quickly, but the two it affected the most was Jude and...

_Him._

Leia curled her legs closer to her body and wrapped her arms around them, cuddling herself and thinking about that man. She didn't recall any more of that night of when she got the scar, but another, different event popped up into her mind. It was the night before they left to stop Gaius, they were in Trigleph, a city on the other world Elympios. That night, Rowen had spoken to Leia and gave her words of comfort, but she still had doubts in her heart. Jude followed Milla, and for the majority of the trip, Leia followed Jude. But it wasn't out of obsession or the need to stalk him; she genuinely cared for his well-being. It was also an opportunity for her to find out about the world outside of her town. What had she been doing all this time?

After Rowen told her to get some sleep, she had stayed outside and thought to herself. She decided to head back to Balan's apartment, only to cross a small playground and saw a familiar brown back on a swing. Her eyes widened and she stepped back, hoping he wouldn't turn around to notice her. Why was she so scared of him? He already apologized enough to her, but the pain she felt back then was something she could not forget. However, if they were going to continue to let him as part of the team, she thought she would have to talk to him. Face to face, no interruptions, and just them two. Putting a hand to her chest, she stood and thought of what to say. Then, without taking another thought, she walked across the bridge and down the hill that resided under it.

The man who sat on the swing was staring up at the night sky, although with the city feeling, it was a bit hard to see the stars. He seemed to be so concentrated at the sky that he didn't even notice the younger girl taking the swing next to him until she actually started swinging, like a little girl. His gaze shifted to his side as the squeaking of the swing set filled the silence. She wasn't swinging very far, just a little bit, but it was enough to catch his attention. He stared at her as she continued. He wasn't annoyed or confused, he was just trying to find the right words to say.

"Look, I..." The both of them spoke at the same time, which caused Leia to stop swinging and finally look at the man. When her eyes met his, he shifted his gaze to the side to avoid her glance.

"It's only right for you to go first," he solemnly said. His usual bright and fun attitude in his voice was not there tonight.

Leia shifted her gaze to the ground. In truth, she wanted him to speak first. If he said something wrong, she could yell at him. But... his actions right now just made her not want to yell at him at all. At this moment, he looked like a child who was lost. As she stared at the man more, she came to that very realization: Alvin was just an overgrown, lost child in a world of strangers. It was still no excuse to threaten to kill her but...

"Hey... It's been a little..." Leia stumbled slightly over her words. "I mean... everyone is working hard to do their best and..." She bit her lower lip. What exactly was she trying to say? She's never been this bad at expressing her words; in fact, she would usually speak before thinking them through, but now she was being extra careful. Why? This man shot her in the back and tried to kill her and her childhood friend. She should be able to say anything she pleased. But, she couldn't. She could feel herself starting to tremble and tear up.

_Come on Leia. This isn't like you. What is wrong with you?_

She then felt something warm cradle her left hand. When she looked up, her eyes widened at the sight: the man had his forehead on the cold chain of the swing and had both of his gloved hands wrapped around her own. His eyes were narrow but they also looked tired.

Tired is exactly how he felt. Tired of lying, tired of being treated like the bad guy, tired of having no one around in which he could rely on. The one thing that kept him going had been lost awhile back, and now that he was back home, what else was there left for him to do? Jude and Milla allowed him to stay as part of their team, but did they really trust him? Through the entire journey, they always put up with him. He really didn't know where he belonged until it was too late, and even now the tension between him and everyone else was so thick, it could be sliced through with a broad sword. Elize helped lighten his mood, but he could still feel the pain he had caused.

And now Leia sat there, next to him. He apologized to her, but did she really forgive him? Being shot in the back isn't something one would forget easily. "I don't know if you really believe me but look... I really am sorry," he quietly spoke, tightening his grasp on her hand. He averted his gaze from her eyes, but still looked at the girl in front of him.

"N-no. It's okay. I mean, I guess it really _isn't _okay but..." She stumbled between her words and pulled her hand out from under his own. She stood up and turned to face him while putting her hands on her hips. She stood in the confident way she usually did, even though confident was the last thing she was feeling. "Alvin..."

He stared at her, his eyes meeting hers. This was the first time she actually said his name since the incident. It felt... rather good to hear his name coming out of her mouth.

"I... want to say that I can't forgive you for what you've done, but that would be a lie. We all assumed..." She shook her head, calmed her nerves, and then stared straight back at Alvin. "I assumed you were a no good traitor, but we never stopped to understand what you were going through." She sighed. What the hell was she saying? "I guess, there are some things that can't be changed but... for better or for worse, what you did to me," she grasped her left shoulder. "Whatever was going on in your head at that time, I know you didn't mean to hurt me. I think I started to understand you a little bit." Leia clasped her hands behind her back and awkwardly gazed at the ground, moving her foot through the dirt. "And... if I don't understand you at all, it would be nice to get to... at least a little. Within your own words. Not by actions or the shady stuff you've been doing."

During her whole speech, Alvin couldn't take her eyes off her. She was determined and she said everything she had to say, at least that's what it sounded like. A small chuckle came from his throat, which turned into a deeper chuckle that was louder than anything she had heard from this man's mouth. Her eyes looked up and she wore confusion on her face – why was he laughing? Did she say something stupid? As his laughter came to a halt, he smiled at her. "Man, why is it that the kids really are the smart ones here?"

She looked at him and puffed her face up while putting her hands on her hips. "I'm not a kid. And maybe it's because you're too stubborn and old to realize what's going on around you!" Leia didn't really mean it – she didn't see Alvin as an old man at all, but she really didn't see herself as a kid either.

Alvin walked closer to her and patted her on the head, which made her feel even more like a kid. "There's no harm in being a kid. Hell, enjoy your youth while you have it. Apparently it's too late for me."

Leia sighed and grabbed Alvin's hand from her head. She held it tight in both of her hands, tightening her grip on his hand. It kind of hurt him, but he wasn't going to say anything. "You still have plenty of youth. You're still stuck with us for a good reason right?" Leia smiled at Alvin, which seemed to pierce through straight to his heart. "I mean, you really aren't _that _old and... it's a good chance to redeem yourself for what you've done to us... I want to know Alvin, who _you _are."

His eyes widened. He was sure Leia hated him for what he did to her, but here she was comforting him. Each word she spoke shocked him even more than the last. He shrugged and chuckled again, placing a hand behind his head like he usually did in a casual manner. "There's not much to know. I'm a shady guy that no one trusts. I came from Trigleph and ever since going to Rieze Maxia 20 years ago, I had been looking for a way back home, all while trying to cure my mother." Alvin sighed and lowered his arms. "When both of those failed I..." He stared back at Leia, who was standing with her hands on her hips, listening intently.

Then, something she wasn't expecting happened. He grabbed her shoulders and pulled her closer to him, embracing her in a tight hug. Her arms hung by her side; she wasn't sure how to react. Her face felt bright red. "A-Alvin, wha-wha-what are you-"

"No amount of apology can make up for what I did to you and I know that. I can't make up excuses and say I lost it... but that's what I..." He bit his lower lip. "Dammit, I'm no good at this stuff. Look, all I knew was how to get by on my own. I never had to rely on anyone... and when everything I knew was destroyed, I kind of... lost it. But... you guys were the only ones who gave me a place to call home in that hell hole of a life... I was stuck in trying," Alvin shook his head as he buried his chin deeper into Leia's shoulder. "Heh, I can't say anything without coming up with an excuse."

Silence swept the air again. Leia, quietly clasped her arms around Alvin's back to finally return the hug. She smiled, but then she moved herself away from Alvin's grip and she raised her palm and brought it clear across his face, shocking him. He slowly turned his face as he held the sore spot with his hand – he looked mortified. "Man that felt good, not gonna lie!" She strutted her arm and grinned at Alvin. She pointed her finger at him, "I want a fair, even rematch. I want a chance to beat the hell out of you for what you did!"

Alvin continued to stare and then he chuckled again. "You really are the competitive type aren't you?"

Leia replied with placing her hands on her hip. "Yes I am. When this is all done, you and I are going to settle things. Then... and only then, can I really truly trust you!" Leia winked at him.

He smiled and brought himself closer. He grabbed the bottom of her chin and brought her face closer to his. Within seconds, their lips locked together in a cold, yet sweet kiss. His eyes were closed gently, but Leia's were wide open and her face had turned bright red. Did he just? She couldn't believe what was happening.

How dare he? First he shoots her in the back, and yeah he apologized and she even forgave him, but this? Now he thinks he can take her first kiss?

She let herself succumb to the sweetness of his scent and the sweetness of his lips on hers, and before she knew it, he had let go of her. She blankly stared until she came back to the reality of everything. She turned her bright red face away and covered her lips, yelling through her hands.

"You, you, you... I mean.. my first kiss was.. going to be with Ju-... No no no no no! How could you? It's not even -"

He grabbed her hands in his own and interrupted her. "It'd probably be better for you if you forgot about me after we take care of Gaius."

_What the hell did he just say? _Leia stared at him with wide eyes. Didn't they just have a moment? How could he even do those things and then say something like that? Maybe he really hadn't changed after all.

"I mean, a charming man like myself is definitely a catch but..." She felt herself glaring at him through her burning face. He then leaned in closer and whispered in her ear, sending chills down her spine. "I'm no good."

He let go of her and walked past her, presumably to go back to Balan's house to sleep. But she couldn't let it end like that. Her hands balled up in fists and on the verge of tears, she turned around and yelled back. "You coward! You can't do those things to me and tell me to forget about you! If you're no good, then you make yourself good! Who do you think you are?" She placed her right hand near her left shoulder once again. "You pretty much made a brand on me and you just run off like that?" His back still turned, he glanced past his shoulder to stare back at Leia and lifted his hand as though he were to say bye. "How am I supposed to just... forget about you? I still need to beat the crap out of you, especially after that stunt you just pulled."

"It's not that hard really." Alvin looked up at the stars and sighed, placing his hands on his hips. "You could do so much better than hang around someone like me. That's all I'm saying."

He continued to walk farther away from Leia and all she could do was stare at that back. "You... you better come see all of us after this. I don't care what you've done, but you can't go through this with all of us and try to disappear from all of our lives. Including me!" Leia ran to try and catch up, but was taken aback when Alvin turned around. She thought she could see tears in his eyes.

"If I ever feel like I'm worthy to be in your company again..." Alvin turned back around, "I don't... want you to be scared anymore. I have a lot of figuring out on my own to do before I come back. So, just forget about me..." He turned slightly around and whispered softly, "I'd do whatever it takes to make it up to you, but I have to find out what _that _is before I could properly see you after this battle..." His eyes shifted to the side. "Hey... can you just pretend tonight never happened?"

Leia looked up at him, a bit confused, but nodded. That was a lie, but she already made the resolve to follow Jude and Milla, to make sure they would obtain victory. She'd be lying if she said she didn't still have feelings for Jude – she always did, and they'd probably never fade away, but he was so stuck on Milla that he didn't even have the time for Leia, at least that's what it seemed like to her. After all this was done, she just wanted to see him smile, even if that meant she had to be forgotten.

Rowen told her to find her own calling, but what would that be? Maybe she was looking for some sort of answer with Alvin, but all he did was leave her more confused than before. With a smile, he turned and walked away, and she didn't even feel it inside her to chase after him.

She wanted an apology; she had gotten that. She wanted to know more about him; he told her in that cryptic way he always did. So why was she still distraught? Because she couldn't beat him up? Was it really that? She shook her head. Alvin was right; it was better to just forget about him if that's really what he wanted. But what really bothered her the most was what he said under his breath before he left. He stole a kiss and then told her he had to work on making things right, and then he goes and asks her to pretend that night never even happened. Leia knew that it was because he accidentally shot her, but it still didn't give him the right to kiss her and leave. The morning after, she spoke to him while they talked about Gaius, and he casually pretended that it was the first time she said anything to him in a while. Remembering the previous night's events, she blushed and looked away. How could he say that with a straight face? Leia guessed that 20 years of lying and doing whatever he pleased probably instilled that horrible habit of his.

Letting go of the memories of that night, Leia stepped out of the bath and dried herself. It really wasn't that late yet, so she put on a simple black gown with ornate flowers printed on it and pulled her hair up in a sloppy pony tail. The gown was technically night wear, but when worn right, it could serve as an evening dress as well. She wanted to go outside and enjoy the fresh air for a little bit – maybe the air would help calm her mind. Her parents were probably right – she was working way too hard for her own good. She slipped on simple bunny slippers and walked down the stairs. Her father was cleaning the kitchen and her mother, Master Sonia, was reading a newspaper.

"Hey guys. Dad, mom..." They both looked up at what they were doing. "I'm going to go stargazing for a bit. I might go to the sea haven, but I won't be too long."

"Aren't those pajamas, Leia?" Sonia's voice sounded a little angry.

Leia sheepishly smiled. "It's not really... besides I have on all the necessary garments under it. It works as an outfit."

Sonia's eyes shifted down to the slippers. "And the slippers?"

Leia sighed, "They're really comfortable mom."

"You really expect me to let you walk out there like that?"

Sonia's voice rang loud and sent chills down Leia's spine. She sighed and walked past her mother. Sonia smirked and pulled out some simple, black sandals with a bright orange flowers that fit the mood of Leia's gown. Leia looked at the sandals and felt herself go red. "Look, if you're going out on a date, don't lie to us. And at least have the decency to tell us and meet the guy."

Leia's face turned bright red. "M-mom! I really am going stargazing! I am not meeting anyone. I don't have anyone to meet!"

"Well, maybe it's about time honey..." Leia's father spoke gently as he continued cleaning.

Sonia smirked and watched as Leia switched her shoes out. "Maybe some nice guy is out there stargazing too. You need a good man that you take care of in your life!"

"W-wait... isn't it the other way around?"

Sonia chuckled and walked around the counter, pushing her daughter outside. "Don't be out too late, or else I'm going to have hell to raise."

"Don't come back until you have a man with you," her father spoke, making Leia's face turn even redder.

"Don't listen to your father. I'll be timing you!"

Leia sighed as she closed the door behind her. She really just wanted to wear something comfortable, but her mother made a big deal about the slippers. Now it looked like she was going to go to a formal dance. Leia felt herself blush as she walked toward the sea haven. There wasn't many people out, but there was still enough to know that it really wasn't that late. When she entered the sea haven, she was surprised to see that there wasn't that many people out. If any place was usually packed, it was the sea haven. There were a few people here and there, but it was usually a lot more packed. The sky was clear and perfect for stargazing – a perfect night for gathering her thoughts. She walked toward the docking area, which she knew normally she shouldn't be back there, but it was the perfect spot for stargazing. Usually, this time of night, the crew men didn't care, especially since they all knew Leia. She walked over and climbed the bar that kept the rest of the sea haven from the dock.

"Oh, hi Leia... Oh," The crew man behind the desk couldn't help but stare at her. It was weird to see her in a dress and she actually looked decent.

"Hey, I'm just here to stargaze. Would it be okay to be by myself?"

"Well, I mean... yeah, but that might be impossible. There's someone on the deck, saying he's waiting for something."

"What? Who could be standing on the deck if they aren't waiting for a boat? Well, I'll just have to take my spot by force," Leia's eyes had a fire in them that reflected her competitive spirit. As she jumped over the bar and walked toward the end of the deck, she noticed a white pigeon flying and white-sleeved arm catching it. A pigeon, at night?

She only knew one person who used such an awkward method of communicating. She stopped in her tracks as she stared at the man. The hair was the same, and the outfit was was the same, except he didn't have his coat or gloves on. He looked a lot smaller without that big coat, but it was definitely him. "Yo... you... Unless you're waiting for a boat or just getting off one, you can't be on this deck."

"Who made that rule up?" He turned his head and smirked. "I've never heard of anything like that before," he winked. He knew exactly who he was talking to, and yet he acted as though nothing happened between them.

She clenched her hands into fists and let the anger go through her. In seconds she ran toward the man and threw a fist toward his face, but he caught it. She gritted her teeth as she angrily glared at him. He winked again. "Long time no see," he said, holding her fist in his hand.

"That's not... You can't... What the hell brings you here anyway?" She threw her other fist toward him and he caught that with his other hand.

"I'm on a business trip. I heard this place has one of the best inns in the area. Family owned and everything, and the owner's cute daughter is a waitress there. I wonder who that could be," he winked, but his words kept on pissing Leia off even more. She kneed him in the stomach, which didn't do much to hurt him, but he did let go of her hands which caused her to step back.

"I don't know if we have rooms for shady businessmen," Leia placed her hands on her hips, scowling.

He smiled and ran his fingers through his hair. He still wore that silly scarf and had everything he had before, except for the giant coat and his gloves. Leia couldn't take her eyes off of him. "That's unfortunate. I was really hoping to meet that daughter. Some of the girls back in Elympios just don't cut it for me..."

Leia could feel her face puff up. Was she really getting jealous over this man? What was she thinking? "Well, you could always try and ask. But the master of the inn is pretty scary, especially if she found out some shady guy was talking to her daughter..." Leia then found herself smiling and tearing up. She couldn't describe what she was feeling at that moment, but she ran toward the man and pounded on his chest with her fist. "Alvin, you little..." She shook her head. "Rotten to the core."

He smiled and wrapped his arms around Leia, resting his chin on her head. "That's right. Rotten to the core. I really am only here on a business trip..."

"So you can't even lie to make it sound good? To say that you're here to see me?" She lifted herself up from his chest and looked up at him.

"What, you want me to lie?"

She scowled. He really was no good. A year didn't even change that, but at least he wasn't a traitor anymore. Still, that "charming" personality stayed the same and it irritated her. Of course, that's what made him... him, so while it irritated her, she wouldn't have it any other way.

He smiled at her and winked. "Well... to be honest it is a business trip but... I wasn't the one who was supposed to come." She glared at him. "When I heard it was going to be near here, in Leronde, I..." He shrugged and ran his fingers through his hair again, placing a hand on his hip. "I didn't know what to say to you. So... I spent all this time trying to figure it out. This chance came up and well," he sighed. "I had to take it. I couldn't hide anymore," he smiled and winked at Leia.

"You know, saying something like, 'Hey, how are you?' would have been a good start!" Leia was fuming at this point, her hands on her hips.

"Well, where's the fun in that? Gotta keep up my mysterious charm for the ladies, you know," he winked and this was Leia's chance to get a good hit on him. She balled her fist and punched him clear across the cheek. "Ow! What the hell was that-"

"I still haven't beaten you up for what you did to me. And now you come here, after almost a year, and after you..." She blushed just remembering the events of about a year ago. That was her first and only kiss, so it still made her nervous just thinking about it. "Don't you dare say you don't deserve that!"

Alvin raised his hands as though he had been caught by the police. "Okay okay. You win. I deserve anything you want to dish out on me." Alvin winked. "If it's by a lovely lady like you, I'll gladly take it."

"You..." Leia cringed and punched his stomach, but he grabbed her leg and pulled it around him, making her blush even more. The position was slightly embarrassing. She forced his arm off her leg and punched him in the face again. She then repeatedly punched his stomach until her arms wore out, and he stood and took every punch. Leia breathed heavily after she pummeled his stomach. It felt good; she thought she got everything out of her. She really just wanted to punch the hell out of him, and she accomplished that.

Then, suddenly, she felt two hands on her shoulders and she found herself plunging toward the ground.

It was, however, a bit of a gentle fall. Alvin had made sure that they didn't hit the pavement as hard as they probably could.

Wait... Leia opened her eyes and saw the bigger figure on top of her. He was barely holding himself up but he was incredibly close to her and... on top of her.

Her face was bright red. His scent was heavy, but it was everything she remembered about him. Did she really do that much damage to him? To cause him to collapse like that? His eyes were closed. "He-hey Alvin!" She called to him and he opened his eyes slightly, smirking.

"You look good when you're in the heat of battle. You really look good like that too," He smiled at her. Leia scowled; he was definitely okay.

Then, in a moment, she decided to do something she never thought she would do. Here this man was, on top of her. The man who shot her. The man who betrayed them. The man who stole her first kiss. The man who she couldn't stop thinking about. The man she just beat up.

The man she had feelings for. He was definitely no good, but that wasn't really the point. Alvin was, in his own way, trying to make amends, and he probably did good things with his business. Alvin was still the same old Alvin, besides all the betraying and lies. And Leia couldn't keep him out of her head, despite how horrible he was.

Because of that, she was tired of him always being the smooth talking one, the one who made the first move. After all, he opened up to her so long ago, yet she was the one he ignored? It was unfair and painful. Leia clasped her hands on the silly, yet beautiful scarf he always wore and pulled him closer to her. She slightly leaned up and pressed her own lips against his. She never initiated a kiss before, so she was probably bad at it, but he didn't seem to mind. The sweetness of his lips filled through her body. She didn't let go of his scarf but instead pulled it closer.

After a few seconds, Alvin pulled himself up and stared at the girl below him. She stared back up at him. "Was that... no good?" She shyly said.

With no words, he clasped one hand on her cheek and another one on her hand and pressed his lips against hers, as if to respond to her question.

Was that no good? Alvin had thought otherwise. He was almost certain Leia still hated him, but all she really just wanted was to throw a bunch of good punches toward him to let her anger out. Even if she wanted to do more damage to him, he would gladly let her because it was what he deserved.

He knew nothing he did could make up for what he did to Leia. It was enough to just be able to hold her like he was, much alone kiss her under the stars. He separated his lips from hers and stared at her face. Her eyes were still closed, but when she realized that she could no longer feel his cold kiss, her eyes slightly opened. Alvin's face was only a few inches away from her own, so she could see the fatigue that defined his features. She still had a hand on his scarf, so she pulled him closer and let his head rest on her shoulder.

"If you're tired, why didn't you come rest...?" She muttered out.

"Who said I was tired?" He tried to hide it, but he wasn't fooling anyone.

Leia sighed and moved her hand from the scarf to the back of his head, sort of ruffling his hair, but resting her hand in his thick mane. "I know I am not the most observant person but, even I can tell how tired you are just by the way you look."

Alvin sighed and let out a small chuckle. "Up until the moment you came to see me, I was still debating on how to approach you. I probably would have been here all night until the crew kicked me out..."

Leia sighed, "So if I never came out here you would be sleeping outside?"

"Well, there's a lovely lady nearby that I'm sure I could have stayed with..."

"Alvin!" Leia grabbed some of his hair in a fist, slightly pulling it.

"Ow ow ow! Hey let off! I'm just kidding," Leia softened her grip on his hair, but still kept her fingers interlocked between the strands. "Don't you know to never harm a man's hair? Well, and scarf too..."

Leia's eyes narrowed in a glare even though she knew he couldn't see her. "I think you need some rest." She gently pushed him off her and he sat straight up. However, his hand still had one of her own in it, so she clumsily fell into his chest as they both sat up. He clasped both of his arms around her and stared up at the sky. Her face was incredibly close to his chest and she felt his heart beating a bit fast. He stared at the stars, and all she could stare at was the white sleeve that covered the strong arm that held her. Her face was burning up.

"So, you still pursuing a nursing career? Can you even prescribe rest?" She could hear the sarcasm in his voice and it irritated her, but, she couldn't help but smile. After all this time, she thought he had given up on her. She really tried to not care, but it kept on creeping up.

In Alvin's mind, he thought that maybe Leia had hated him. After all this time. He hoped that maybe she would have forgotten him, but he also knew that hope was him trying to run from something again. This opportunity presented itself, so he took it, knowing that he had to face it.

Leia pounded on his chest and stood up, offering her hand to him to help him stand up. "I still have all the knowledge of a nurse, so you have to listen to me." She winked as he grabbed her hand and lifted himself up. He ran his fingers through his hair and watched as she turned around, leading the way.

His smile shifted to a look of concern as he gazed at the young woman's back in front of him. "Hey..." He grabbed her hand to stop her from moving forward, which startled her, but she didn't turn around. Her body felt stiff. After the moment they just shared, could he really turn on her so quickly? She could feel him moving closer, and before she knew it, gentle fingers traced the lining of the scar where she was shot... by him. The touch of his fingers stung slightly, but she didn't let the pain show. "That's... pretty bad. After all this time and it still..."

Leia shook her head. "I forget it's there. I mean, it's not a big deal - "

Her words stopped when she felt something else touch her scar. Alvin had pressed his cold lips on the old wound, as if to soothe it. The touch sent chills down her spine. He gently kissed around the wound, and then back up her neck, and wrapped his arms around her, placing a gentle kiss on the lobe of her ear. "It kind of is a big deal... I really fucked up, didn't I?"

Blushing, Leia shifted her eyes away from Alvin. He was trying to apologize, but he still kissed her neck and ear gently. Her feelings had never been so mixed before. "That's not... I already beat you good for it, right?" He apologized again and again, and she said she would hurt him as bad as she could for revenge, but what she did earlier that evening was enough to release her pent-up rage. She wasn't sure what to say at this moment. What could she say?

"I know but..." His arms wrapped around her tighter. "What can I do to make it up to you? Apologizing won't cut it. Even if you shot me back, the pain I caused everyone wouldn't disappear. I'm here to make it up, even if it means giving you my life. Please, Leia..."

Her name coming from his voice felt good to hear, but it pained her to see him like this. This wasn't like him at all. Much like the time he had tried to kill her and Jude – his personality switch flipped and it was like he turned into a completely different person. However, this was just another side to Alvin; one that no one ever saw, one that he hid away for a long time, but the one that would creep up from time to time when he was clearly emotionally distraught. She sighed.

Actions speak louder than words right? She placed a hand to Alvin's cheek and gently caressed it. She then turned her head to face him, but her eyes closed as soon as she pressed her lips onto Alvin's. His eyes went wide from Leia's action. He even gently let go of his grip on her because of the shock of it. She gently let go of him and stared into his eyes, her determination clear in her eyes. "I've forgiven people for not even apologizing... Alvin..." She gulped before speaking. "Don't you ever, ever, disappear without contacting me for that long again." She grabbed his scarf and put a fist on her hip. "Or I will do much, much more than punch you multiple times."

Angry Leia was definitely scary. She hadn't given him her wrath after he shot her, and it was only a slight wrath he felt tonight. "But that was-"

"No more excuses. Alvin..." She pulled him closer. Her face was already heated from the closeness that they shared this evening. "You can't shoot me, apologize and kiss me, not talk to me for half a year, and then come back thinking it's all okay."

"But it's not-"

She put a finger to Alvin's lips. She was not going to let him say a word of excuse. "That's why, the only way to make it up to me is to..." She gulped again. Was she really going to say it?

All of these feelings that had been bottled up for so long. Truth be told, she always liked Alvin when they first met. She had respected him, even when it was revealed that he was part of Exodus. She was such a sucker for sad, sap stories like Alvin and his mother; really, she wanted to be there for him, but she knew she couldn't because they really didn't know each other that well. Who was Alvin? How did he know Milla and Jude? Still, Leia wanted to be a part of Jude's life, and that involved knowing everyone that was around him.

It grew to the point that she wanted to know more about Alvin as well, but being someone who constantly lied and betrayed, there wasn't much she could get out of him. But she had always paid close attention to him, even if no one noticed. Back when they first found out about the schism, Alvin had started to act even more unusual than before. He was more serious than before, but when she tried to point it out to the others, they paid no mind to her. She was too scared to ask him herself though. Everything had gotten worse too, from each moment they moved on, fighting alongside Gaius, and even learning about his previous relationship.

All she wanted to do was know more about him, and perhaps even comfort him, but they were always two worlds apart from each other. Then, after everything went downhill, the only thing on her mind was keeping Jude happy. However, deep in her mind, she had wondered where Alvin had disappeared off to.

A lot happened between them, and maybe Alvin never really knew that she had harbored those feelings all along. However, the roles have turned and all he wanted was to make everything up to her. For shooting her. For betraying everyone. For all the horrible things he caused.

"...Be my boyfriend..." She finally muttered out, quietly as she stared at the ground.

He stared at her for a few moments, and then let out a small laugh. "Oh? So what was I before? Just a random guy you kissed?"

She looked up and puffed her cheeks out in anger. "_I _kissed? Excuse me, Al, but who was the one who-"

Soft lips interrupted her and slowly pulled away. "If that's all I have to do, then I don't mind."

His attitude had gotten more serious, but his tone was soft and charming. He smiled and wrapped his arm through Leia's, walking arm and arm to go back to her house. Then, he just realized something.

She called him Al. Only one other person called him Al before, and he'd rather not think about her. He was a bit too tired to think of past relationships anyway. That previous relationship was full of lies and deceit, based around a spy, and he only cared about himself more than anything. He wouldn't let himself become _that _person again. Especially with someone like Leia.

Sweet, naïve, young, and innocent Leia. She really was too good for someone like him, but the fact that she decided so strongly to be in this weird relationship, Alvin would gladly accept. The two walked arm in arm toward her home, not saying a word until they got there.

Leia stopped before the front door. How long had it been since she went out tonight? Was it too late? She stood in fear for what her mother would do to her.

Alvin noticed that she stood still and he looked at her. Now that he thought about it, he never did meet her parents, but he had heard stories of how scary her mother was when she was pissed off. "Were you out too late...?" The question was full of concern, but he had a smirk and hint of sarcasm in his voice.

"I... maybe... Mom is gonna kill me..." Leia held her arms closer to Alvin. "Worse yet, she might kill you too..."

Alvin chuckled, yet his expression was full of worry. "Well... as long as you're safe, whatever happens to me won't matter."

Leia's face felt red, but that didn't hide the fear she felt knowing that she would have to face her parents. She sighed and stepped forward, still holding Alvin's arm, and slowly opened the door. The lights were off. Was that a good thing? Maybe they were both asleep. Leia sighed with relief as both she and Alvin walked inside the dark room. She let go of his arm and walked a little bit further. Then in an instant, the lights turned on and Leia stood still, frightened stiff. Her mother was around, she just knew it.

"LEIA!" Her mother's voice resounded. From behind the inn counter, a scary woman came running out. She jumped over the counter and ran toward Leia. Leia cowered in fear, but the woman did not harm her at all.

"M-mom I'm sorry! I lost track of time and - "

"You don't realize how late it is? Couldn't you tell by the starlight?" Master Sonia's voice was scary as she scolded Leia. "Do you know how early I have to wake up to start this place tomorrow? It's going to be a busy day!"

Alvin couldn't help but let out a small snort, which caused Master Sonia's glare to turn to him. "And who are you?"

"Oh me? I'm uh... Just a friend of Leia's." Alvin bowed, and then stood straight up, putting his arms behind his head.

Sonia cocked an eyebrow at him, then back at Leia. "You hang around weirdos like him?" Alvin couldn't help but smile at that. "Was he one of your traveling companions?" Her tone surprisingly shifted.

Leia stood back up from her cowering pose and nodded.

"Were you with him the whole time you were out?"

Leia nodded. She made sure to keep her mouth shut.

After moments of painful silence, a heavy sigh sounded throughout the hotel. Master Sonia placed her firm hands on her hips and stared sternly between Leia and Alvin. "Because of this, you'll have to work your father's shift in the morning! That's going easy on you!" She then glared at Alvin. "And you there! I'll let you stay here, but you have to help too. And don't you even _think _about sharing a room with my daughter!"

Alvin stared at the older woman with a grin on his face while he nodded. Sonia scowled as she folded her arms across her chest. "Leia, go to your room."

"Ye... yes mom," Leia cowered past her mother, looked back with apologetic eyes toward Alvin, and then went up the stairs.

"You will follow me to your room," Master Sonia demanded of Alvin.

Alvin sat on the bed of the room. It was comfortable enough, and the inn was very warm and welcoming, even though he had been a strange man who arrived with the owner's daughter on a starry night. He chuckled to himself thinking about the entire situation. His shoes were off, and he had one leg stretched out while the other one was curled up against his chest, being cradled with his arms. The starlight shined through the window, hitting Alvin's face as he thought about the past.

Leia called him Al. Maybe it was a slur and she didn't mean to. Hearing his name being called that from another woman put his thoughts into a spiral.

Presa. Jill. Sure, Alvin would always joke about being quite the philanthropist, but in reality he only had one serious relationship in his life (that's not to say that he hadn't fooled around with other girls before). Their love grew within a short time, but there were too many differences between them to work out.

She worked as part of a spy group and revealed herself to Alvin, trusting him and hoping to live her life with him. However, for a pretty price, he sold her out to the Rashugal army and stood by as she was tortured, as well as while all of her previous comrades were killed in front of her.

It was a part of his past he didn't care to dwell on. It was all part of just trying to go back home, however it involved him toying with a woman's heart for his own personal gain. Back then, he didn't much care about the consequences surrounding other people, as long as he was able to help his mother and find a way back home.

Because of his dangerous nature, he caused a lot of events to spiral out of control once he met Jude and Milla. For the longest time, Alvin had no real place to belong to, and to him that was just fine. He'd drift on from place to place, doing what was necessary to keep on living, because that was all he knew.

Presa... was still bitter, and meeting her again definitely stirred up previous feelings. However, he wasn't sorry in the bit. In fact, he regretted not killing her sooner – but, in the very end, he stared as she fell to her death right before his eyes. She died protecting the place she belonged to, and he would have to protect his new place of belonging. The two had loved each other, but they also hated one another, and the lies Alvin held from Presa resulted in the two not working out. And why should it, he thought? She found a place without him, and that was just fine too.

She was the only person to ever call him Al. While he never thought much about it until now, he really did enjoy the little pet name he received. And now Leia had called him such. While it stirred some old feelings up, he enjoyed the fact that Leia could call him such a name.

He leaned back and stared at the ceiling, resting his head under his arms. He definitely had a few vital "tricks" up his sleeve when it came to late night knowledge, however his emotions themselves were not the greatest to convey. Only one woman had actually caused him to question everything about himself. As much as he would have liked it to be Leia, it was none other than Milla. Alvin thought he could treat Milla just like another person, even with the knowledge that she was a spirit. However, Milla's spirit and determination drew him to her, almost like Jude was drawn to her.

Milla knew his dirty secrets. She could have killed him. He could have killed her. He planned it carefully. But when she had died at first, it was a shock – there was no reason for her to die, and it just put him into an emotional hell in which he couldn't explain his actions.

When Leia first joined their team, he thought of her as an obnoxious puppy, much like Jude, that was also sort of endearing in a way. Goofy, fun, care-free, Leia, that could smile and turn all the problems away. She loved competition and fun things, even silly high-fives or victory poses. Despite her skill with the bo-staff, she was a bit clumsy. Alvin couldn't help but feel some sort of amusement from her. However, she was an easy target, and he tricked her a few times to be the scapegoat to see how Gilland would react, such as the boulder in Xian Du.

Unfortunately, she was also the one to protect herself and Jude when Alvin lost all sanity. She fought on her own, and it made him struggle between what he should be doing and what he actually was doing.

Leia or Milla? Which one really helped him along the path? Rather, it was both of them. Of course, Milla couldn't be his. Even if she were around, Jude's love for Milla was too intense to compete with. Leia... the last thing he wanted was to use her, but he owed her his life.

His feelings weren't as strong, but the way Leia treated him despite everything made him really feel as though he belonged here, by her side. This was right.

Caught in his thoughts, he didn't even realize his door had creaked open, but when he snapped out of his thoughts, he stared at the figure in front of him. The darkness shaded the figure, but it was pretty obvious who was standing in the door way. He could tell she was staring at him, even though he couldn't see her eyes. How long had she been there? What kind of expressions was he making in his thoughts? He smirked and sat up, quietly inviting her in.

"It's not very nice to disobey your mother. I thought you were a better kid than that," Alvin's snark still sounded through, but there was a clear sense of exhaustion in his tone.

A sigh was heard from the other side of the door and the figure slowly walked in, making sure to quietly close the door. She had let her hair down but still wore the dress she had from the night, but she also had white, fluffy, bunny slippers on her feet. It was ridiculously cute that Alvin couldn't help but smile. She was scowling while she looked down at the floor. Her face felt hot; she was probably blushing, but Alvin couldn't see.

She didn't have anything to say apparently, or maybe she was just waiting for him to do something. Despite that, the silence that filled the air created more tension than what was necessary. Maybe she came in to give him a good beat down because she still hadn't forgiven him. Alvin moved around as though he were to get up, but a small voice, much unlike what she normally sounded like, stopped him.

"S-stay there," she quietly said. She sounded nervous. Alvin let out a small chuckle and leaned back, looking back at Leia.

"So, you going to keep me guessing as to why you're here? Or do you just like to torture me with this silence?" His grin pierced through Leia, even though she could barely see it. She walked closer to him until she was near the edge of his bed. She looked at him, but then shifted her eyes to the floor, seeming to be a bit embarrassed.

Alvin shot her another grin and leaned in closer to get a good look at her features. "What, don't tell me you're scared of the dark and needed somebody to cuddle with?" He winked and could feel her glaring at him. Without saying a word, she leaned closer to him. She planted her hands on the bed next to his body and gently touched her forehead with his own, in which by now they were within kissing distance with each other. "Hey, if you're feeling frisky, just say so. Though, I don't think now is the best time to -"

"Just shut up already," Leia finally spoke and she leaned in closer to kiss him. Her arms were trembling to just try and keep herself propped up as their lips joined together. This kind of attitude from Leia surprised Alvin- she was definitely not the type to do something like this, so what had come over her tonight? He felt her arms shaking and wrapped his arms around her so she wouldn't fall. Realizing that he had grasped her, she moved her arms and slammed her hands on his shoulders, not even realizing that her legs had begun to straddle his lap to help keep herself up. Noticing this embarrassing position, her face turned bright red and she could feel the heat in her body rising.

"Hey, why are you acting all frazzled for? You're the one who started this," Alvin was enjoying this too much.

Leia couldn't look at him in the eyes. "Yes but..."

"You gotta own up for your own actions," He winked and ran a hand through her hair, which sent chills down her spine. "You do something like this, I can't be responsible for what might happen."

Leia puffed her face up as she usually did when she was annoyed or irritated and slightly looked at Alvin. "I'm not the one controlling you," she retorted.

He smirked and leaned back on the bed, holding her and bringing her closer to the bed with him. Her bunny slippers fell off her feet as she was pulled closer to Alvin on the bed. She still straddled him in a very embarrassing position, and his back was almost to the wall, so he was half sitting up and lying down at the same time, all while Leia had her legs on each side of him and her arms on his chest, just trying to keep herself propped up. His arms never let go of her. "So why did you come in here?" He smirked.

"I... wanted to say a proper good night, but I noticed you were deep in thought so I -" A hand went to a place that she wasn't expecting, which caused her to panic and blush at the same time. Noticing where it was, she grabbed the arm and pried it off of her bottom and put it back around her back. "You touch me there again and I -"

He gently pushed down on her back, causing her body to fall a little closer to him. Her face was right by his chest. He could feel the heat rising from her embarrassment, but that only made him laugh even more. Right at this moment, she was incredibly innocent and adorable; nothing like he had seen before in this kind of situation.

"I'm serious, Alvin."

He frowned and brought her face closer to his. "Oh? So it's still Alvin?"

She blinked, confused at his statement.

"Earlier, you called me Al."

She shifted her eyes, "That was unintentional. It probably brought up some painful memories. I won't do it again."

Alvin scowled and patted the top of her head. "Please... call me Al."

Leia stared at him in confusion and then nodded. She brought her forehead to his. "Al... Can I... I mean... I don't know how to say this but I… I want to stay here with you, tonight..."

"I will do anything you want me to, anything to make up to you for what I've done." Leia sighed at this. She got that he wanted to repent, but she also wanted him to... well, want this as much as she did.

"I don't want it out of pity. I want you to... um..." She shifted her gaze. She was a bit embarrassed by what she was about to say.

Alvin smirked and softly kissed her lips, slowly letting them go soon afterward. "Next to you is where I belong," he coolly said.

He was known for being a liar and a traitor, but his words here sounded genuine. Leia's heart skipped a few beats but she rested her head on his shoulder, realizing that he meant what he said. Make it up to her? Be her boyfriend she said, but she wanted it to be right and unforced. Even now, she was sure there were some lingering feelings inside of him – after all, there were definitely some still inside of herself, but those feelings would have to be discussed at another time.

Alvin's hand moved from her back to the lower part of her body, caressing the back of her leg, which made her jump a little. His hands really were soft.

"So... Miss Leia Rolando, what is it you wanted to do tonight?" His voice had a bit of cynicism to it; she could tell he was teasing her.

She refused to look at his eyes, knowing that his hands were on the back of her legs. Her gaze shifted and her face was bright red – she could feel the heat. She knew that if her mom found her in Alvin's room in the morning, that her mom would harm both of them. Even if it was something as harmless as sleeping next to each other, her mom wouldn't accept that kind of an answer. Leia sighed and could feel Alvin's hands tighten on her legs. Without looking at him, she could feel his breath next to her own. Soon, a ticklish sensation was felt on her ear lobe, which sent chills down her spine.

Near wear she straddled Alvin, she could feel heat rising there as well – from both her and him. Everything about it was incredibly embarrassing, but it also made Leia feel very happy. "A-Alvin..." She mumbled as he nibbled slightly on her ear.

"Hmmm?" He let go of her ear and moved a hand to her back, realizing that she had sat up and stared straight down at him. He was completely on his back, with only a bit of a lean so he could stare at Leia. She didn't shift her eyes away from him – her hands were on his shirt and they fumbled a bit, finding their way toward the buttons that kept it together, and there they stayed.

He stared at her, thinking her eyes were half open, but realized there was a cute sound coming from her. She was snoring. Her head gently fell onto his right shoulder and he reached to pat the back of her head. He couldn't help but smile at this; she was very tired. Alvin could feel her small breaths on his own chest and he cradled her head as she slept. Slowly rising up so he wouldn't wake her, he carefully placed his arms under her to lift her up. She lied in his arms like a baby, sound asleep and not a care in the world. He gently laid her down on his bed and stood up, adjusting his tie.

Leia was sprawled on the bed, sleeping away when just moments before she was on top of Alvin. He smiled at the cute display in front of him and sat down next to her. He then lied himself down, looking at the sleeping girl in front of him and he gently brushed her cheek with the back of his hand. He gently kissed her lips and whispered, "I'm sorry, Leia."

Alvin attempted to turn away, but a gentle hand grabbed his arm and caused him to look back at the girl. "…Don't… leave… Al…" She softly mumbled between her soft snores. He smiled and stared back at her. She gripped his arm even tighter. "Don't… ever… leave… me…alone…again."

This was right. Next to Leia was where Alvin belonged, and as Leia drifted further into her sleep, she knew that next to Alvin was where she belonged as well. Their tragic happenings in the past only allowed the two of them to realize just how broken they both were, and realize that they were right for each other. Never again would Alvin leave Leia alone.


End file.
